Should a Christian attend a gay wedding? Let’s say you have a friend or family member who just happens to be gay, and they invite you to their wedding. What do you do? There’s a chance you’ll find yourself in this situation, and if you do, you need to have your answer ready.
There is no easy, cut and dry answer here, because there are many different scenarios. But let’s look at a couple of passages of scripture.
What does the Bible say about marriage?
For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined together to his wife.
God’s design for marriage is between a man and a woman. That doesn’t change with our cultural shifts.
What would Jesus do?
Friend of sinners...tax collectors and other notorious sinners came to hear Jesus teach.
Jesus was a friend to sinners. He was known (and criticized) for his willingness to hang out with people the religious leaders considered too corrupt and sinful.
How do we balance our commitment to biblical marriage and also following Jesus’ example to be a friend of sinners?
If someone felt comfortable enough to ask you to come to their gay wedding as a Christian, that could be a sign that you’ve done a good job establishing and building a relationship that is based on love and grace.
Why did someone feel comfortable enough to invite you, a Christian, to a gay wedding? Maybe it’s a sign you are good at showing love and grace. But how far does that go?
When faced with this question, you may want to reconsider what you define as “support.” Let’s say we have someone who is struggling with alcoholism. You don’t “support” them by taking them to the bar. If you have someone who is struggling with sexual sin, you don’t support them by sending them pornography. In the same way, supporting a gay friend does not mean going to their wedding, rather it means trying to lead them out of that sin and down the right path.
Gay weddings: More than a party
You also need to redefine how you view the wedding ceremony. To Christians, a wedding isn’t just a spectator sport or a social gathering. It’s a worship service and celebration of two people agreeing to come together in a holy covenant. Often the minister will ask the attendees to agree to pray for and support the union. If you can’t comfortably do that, you probably should avoid going to a gay wedding.
Here’s a hard question. Does your love for God and your respect for the institution of biblical marriage supersede your love for the person getting married? I can’t answer that for you, but it is a matter of the heart to consider.
You have to be willing to accept the fact that you refusing to go to your friend’s wedding because of their sexuality could very well spell the end of their relationship.
Do you think I have come to bring peace to the earth? No, I have come to divide people against each other!
This means that when you take a stand for Christ, you’re going to encounter division and opposition.
If you consider not attending the wedding, you need to be very clear about why. And be clear that you’re not rejecting the person, rather you’re rejecting the behavior and lifestyle. There is a difference.
For more helpful biblical Christian content from Allen Parr, visit his YouTube channel The BEAT or browse other topics on the Let’s Equip blog!